KihKoh

One day, a husband telephones his wife, but his daughter answers. “Hello!” “Hey honey, this is daddy. Is mommy near the phone?” “No daddy, she’s upstairs in the bedroom with uncle Jake.” “But you don’t have an uncle Jake, sweetie…” “Uh yes I do, and he’s upstairs in the bedroom with mommy right now.” “Ok…

Two blonde girls are standing, one on each side of a river. One of the blondes yells over to the other one, “How do I come about getting to the other side of the river?”. The other blonde angrily yells back, “You see, it’s blondes like you that make blondes like me look bad. You…

A mother was teaching his child about the side-effects of alcohol. She gets two short glasses, filling one with water and the other with whiskey. She says “I want you to see this.” She puts a worm in the water, and it swims around. She puts a worm in the whiskey, and the worm dies…

An applicant is being interviewed for an engineering position Interviewer: Your resume says that you can solve math problems quickly. Applicant: Yes Interviewer: Okay, what is 35 x 8? Applicant: 250! Interviewer: That’s way off. Applicant: Well, it is, but as my resume said, I’m a quick solver.

A man brings his dog into a talent agency. He says he’s got a real talented dog. Figuring that this won’t cut into lunch, the agent agrees to see the dog’s tricks. First, the man puts out some number blocks and asks the dog “what’s two times two?” The dog dutifully paws the number four…

A man is flying in a hot-air balloon and realizes he is lost. He reduces height and spots a man below. He lowers the balloon farther and shouts, “Excuse me! Can you tell me where I am?” The man below says: “Yes, you’re in a hot-air balloon, hovering 30 feet above this field.” “You must…

All his life, Pedro had wanted to be a pirate. And when he got the opportunity to interview for a position on a pirate ship, he was overjoyed. Arriving at the quay, Pedro and the other pirate hopefuls stood around and waited for the captain to call them one by one on board for their…

How many Irishmen does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Usually one. Lightbulbs are relatively easy to screw in, although depending on the position/location of said light it may require a stepladder or some sort of object to stand on to elevate yourself. Always be careful when installing electronics, make sure the light switch…

A horse goes to the vet complaining about stomach pains. After some tests, the vet confirms it’s a parasite. He gives the horse a prescription and tells him to come back if the problem persists. The horse looks at the prescription, and becomes visibly nervous. “A dewomer? Are you sure it’s safe?” “Positive,” says the…

My wife yelled from the bedroom asking, “Do you ever get a shooting pain across your body like someone’s got a voodoo doll of you and they’re stabbing it?” I replied, “No, honey.” She yelled back, “How about now?”