One day a teacher was greeting his new class. He stood up in front of the class and said, “Would anyone who thinks he or she isn’t smart enough for third grade…
School
An elementary school teacher, wanting to point out proper behavior, was asking the youngsters rules that their parents might give before taking them to a nice restaurant. “Don’t play with your food,”…
“If you had a dollar,” quizzed the teacher, “and you asked your father for another dollar and fifty cents, how much money would you have?” “One dollar,” answered little Johnny “You don’t…
The math teacher saw that Johnny wasn’t paying attention in class. She called on him and said, “Johnny! What are 4, 2, 28 and 44?” Little Johnny quickly replied, “NBC, CBS, HBO…
An English teacher at a university spent a lot of time marking grammatical errors in her students’ written work. She wasn’t sure how much impact she was having until one overly busy…
The teacher was quizzing the grade one class on counting. “Who knows what comes after three?” “Four,” answered little Timmy. “What comes after six?” “Seven,” answered little Suzie. “Very good,” the teacher…
A young man hired by a supermarket reported for his first day of work. The manager greeted him with a warm handshake and a smile, gave him a broom and said, “Your…
An elementary school teacher, well versed in educational jargon, asked for a small allotment of money for “behavior modification reinforcers.” The principal saw the item and asked, “what in heaven’s name is…
A boy came home from school and told his mother he had been given a part in the school play. “Wonderful,” said his mother, “what part is it?” The boy grinned, “I…
A teacher was leaving the staff room when she found the Principal standing in front of the paper shredder with a piece of paper in his hand. “Listen,” said the Principal, “this…
One mother arrived at school each morning with her seven children in tow, all a bit rumpled but never the less on time. Scarcely able to get her one child ready for…
Two teachers, a physicist and a mathematician, were sitting in the faculty lounge. Suddenly, the coffee machine sparked and caught on fire. The physicist grabbed a bucket and leaped towards the sink,…