I used to work in a pub next to a hospital and this guy walked in one day with his hospital gown on and holding a drip on a stand that was still connected to his veins.

I asked him how I could help and bizarrely he said, “Can I have 2 pints of lager, 2 pints of Guinness, 4 jack Daniels and coke, 3 gin and tonics, and 6 shots of tequila.

It’s a free country so I start to pour the drinks and put them on the bar one at a time. As I finished pouring all of the drinks he downed them in order and finished on the shots of tequila which he dispatched one at a time in a quick pace.

He then looked at me really sad and said, “I shouldn’t have drunk all that with what I’ve got.” I said, “Why what have you got?” He said, “About £3.50.”