The new bride went crying to her mother. “Momma, I can’t get my husband to do anything. I want him to fix up the house, but he keeps putting it off.” “Honey,”…
Relationships
One morning a woman said to her husband, “I bet you don’t know what day this is.” “Of course I do,” he quickly answered, then ran off to work. At 10 AM,…
At the airport check-in counter, I overheard a woman ask for window seats for both herself and her husband. The clerk pointed out that this would prevent them from sitting together. “Sweetie,”…
Time has no meaning at all to some shoppers. A woman left one morning on one of her shopping expeditions announcing to her husband, “I’m going to do some shopping. I’ll be…
A man rushed to the jewelry store soon after the doors opened one morning and said he needed a pair of diamond earrings. The clerk showed him a wide selection, and quickly…
A young man staggered into the small-town bakery at the crack of dawn on an extremely cold, wet, and stormy morning. “Thank heavens you are open,” he gasped. “Do you have fresh…
A woman was walking down the street with a baby ape in her arms when a friend stopped her and asked what she was doing with the ape. “I just bought this…
Robert bought his girlfriend a piano for her birthday. A few weeks later, Robert’s friend inquired how she was doing with it. “Oh,” said Robert, “I persuaded her to switch to a…
Two elderly women were fussing about their husbands over tea one day. “I do wish my Leroy would stop biting his nails. That makes me terribly nervous!” the first one said. “Oh,…
A grandmother overheard her 5-year-old granddaughter playing “wedding”. The wedding vows went like this… “You have the right to remain silent, anything you say may be held against you, you have the…
As a woman was about to go home from a long and stressful day at the office, her cell phone rang. It was her husband. “Will you be joining me in the…